No mail

Feeling sad, and alone tonight.

Being an ocean away from all friends and family brings me down quite often. When I rush home to turn on my laptop, and therere no new emails in my inbox...something inside me dies.

I am the girl everyone has forgotten.

Hey I miss you.
Can you hear that?

Friends of mine

Dear Diary?Do you have friends? I know you do. Anyway, I have a lot of friends in school and they are awesome!But they give me no space!!! Especially my friend named Melissa. She copies me all the time like she wants to be me!!! My best friend hates Melissa and she complains when Melissa tries to be me. Melissa hates my best friend too. Melissa is a show off too. She's good at drawing but she thinks she's all that. Let's stop talking about her. There's this girl in my class who shows her buttcrack so boys will like her. But boys actually HATE HER!!! All the people in my class vote who's the most popular boy and girl. The most popular girl was me!!! That is soooo AWESOME!!! Well,if you guys have friends like that or regular friends, comment about it!!!

Words

I found this and liked it.?I think I should read it often......
"After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. You learn that love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't mean security.?You begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises. You begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child. You learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. You learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong, and you really do have worth."

Crushes

Let's talk about CRUSHES. My crush asked me out but I said NO!!! Isn't that weird??? I feel so STUPID!!! I was just sooooo AFRAID of people making up RUMORS about us that isn't TRUE. That's how people in my school act!!! Besides I still couldn't go out with him because that's my best friend's ex-boyfriend. But my best friend told me I could go out with him but I knew inside he heart she didn't want me to go out with him so I didn't. I mean what kind of friend would I be if I went out with him??? He stillries to win my heart back!!!. He even gavee a stuffed toy animal but I didn't accept it and I don't klnow why!!!f you had and experience like that with your crush comment abou it and I will put it on my diary next time I have a story about my crush!!!

I've realised that writing really does help me de-stress. all those times my dad has told me, 'Natalie, write your feelings down, good or bad, write what you're thinking,write hat you might want to tell someone but you can't say it to their face..it'll help, trust me.'
I think maybe i never thought it would really help, i just kinda thought he was talkin nothing...but its true, it does help me. for some strange reason though, I can't keep a written diary. I've tried writing my thoughts down, but I always get bored , and then I discovered MDD..and its helped me loads. sometimes i dont write in it for ages, and then I miss it. I have so much going on in my head. sometimes i start to type, and so much fills my thoughts that I didnt even know I was thinking about, and I just wanna get it all down on the screen.Fall into my own small world .

4/12

Yesterday I said I wasn't gonna sleep until late at night but I couldn't make it and got knocked out at 5 pm . I woke up this morning at 8 am with a horrible headache but I still managed to go eat breakfast and shoot some hoops after .hile I was shoot hoops with my sister the ball that he brought was over pumped and in the end the ball was in his handed and just exploded . The ball blew up before I even had a chance to tell him to drop it . It was very dangerous but he didn't even freak out and we just left because we didn't have a ball to shoot with . Around 4:30 pm my friends came over to play cards and we ended up in a tie because me and Peter ran out of luck which cost us the game . Well its was a fun day for me just hanging with my friends playing cards and having lots of fun . I am going to visit my dad tomorrow around 10 am and probably take my mom to the mall to buy some lotions and supplements for my aunties . I also wrote the checks for ALL the payments today which I dislike very much but I still finished it . Its sprinkling outside right now and its seems like its gonna rain overnight . Well I am gonna head to bed and get my much needed rest for tomorrow.

Photos review

I like to take pictures . Whenever I go out , I always remember my keys , cell phone , wallet , except for these items , my camera is one of the most important things for me . When I was a little girl , my father used to took photos and my sister . Actually , I didn't like the feeling to be taken photos . Afteryears , I grew up . When the day I was 16 years old , my father gave me a digital camera as my gift . I made it a rule to take pictures from that time . One day , when I was using the computer , I found all of my photos in the C disk . I reveiwed the photos , in the same time , I reviewed my memory . Suddenly I realized that why my Dad gave me the camera . He hopes that I can record the process of my growth .